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hapter Four:
The 21 Emotions OfLife
"People should not be used as pawns. Remember, what you do to others, you do to yourself."

"Every so often we heed our inner voices. The results are profound. Listen to the voices much more closely. You may be surprised to discover they think like you".

Listening to your thoughts, reaps huge rewards. One doesn't have to be a bounty hunter to collect the pay."

To comprehend exactly what emotions are, we first must define the emotions in realistic terms. There are only twenty-one emotions. They consist of ten positive emotions, ten negative emotions and one emotion which is both positive and negative. We are all aware there are more than twenty-one words which explain emotions, but using the Thesaurus Dictionary it was discovered that all the synonyms eventually break down to only twenty-one words. A number of words which are normally used to describe emotions are not the actual emotion but the application to make them an emotion. Applications are a combination of one or more of the words which are normally used to define the final twenty-one emotions. One sample of an application would be frustration. For one to be frustrated it is absolutely fundamental that a sequence or combination of specific emotions come into play.
The twenty-one emotions are listed below in order of sequential significance beginning with the highest positive emotion and then specifying the next emotional order of reference, eventually reaching the lowest negative emotion, hate.

All TheEmotions

At all times, we are encountering a combination of the twenty-one emotions. In reality we cause the twenty-one emotions to interact with us and we design the outcome of the interplay with these emotions for ourselves. We force ourselves to play out emotional experiences by partaking in circumstances we have designed.
There are only three different emotions we can ascribe to each and every decision we make. One is a positive emotion, the second is a negative emotion and the third emotion is the corrective emotion.
The positive emotion is the emotion we are striving towards to reach a decisive successful decision. The negative emotion is the emotion which is causing our indecisiveness or in most cases our procrastination, which could lead us to a wrong conclusion. The third emotion or corrective emotion is the catalyst between the positive emotion and the negative emotion. The corrective emotion once it is known and used, offsets the negative emotion and enhances the positive emotion.
The aforementioned does not mean other emotions cannot be displayed, but during the point of finally making the decision the emotions required to make the decision will only number three.
To explain the decision process further, we should consider that for every decision there is either a "yes" or a "no". A decision where some of us have difficulty deciding whether our answers to a question are either a "yes" or "no" is procrastination or indecision. A "yes" answer to the problem is based on either a positive or negative emotion. As an example, let us presume the decision required would be whether we should marry or not, and the answer is "yes". The decision can either be constructive or destructive depending on the emotion used while making the actual decision. On the positive side, the decision could have been made with love, the love for one's self and the love for another. The decision based on love could eventually be a correct or positive choice. But let us presume the "yes" answer was based on greed instead of love. A decision based on greed instead of love would be a negative emotion reaction to the question, or we would be placing ourselves in a potentially negative problematic situation.
Now let us further presume the answer to the question was "no". A "no" answer could either be a positive or a negative reaction or solely an emotional response. Possibly recognizing that the long-term potential of the relationship may not be as sound as we may like, we could answer "no" to a marriage proposal with gratitude or gratefulness. Expressing gratitude or gratefulness is a positive reaction to the question. We actually saw a potential problem and made sure that we didn¹t deviate from our original game plan. At the same time we could answer in the affirmative knowing we will probably be wasting our time. Knowing that problems exist and answering in the affirmative can cause fear or apprehension because of our lack of understanding or empathy.
It is necessary to display precise emotions or to act with precise emotions to help offset or eliminate the potential of incorrectly making the wrong decision. Alternatively we should act on emotions which will eventually reach a worthwhile end-result. Above all, emotions should offset the possibility of procrastination. Consequently, the positive emotion of empathy could solve the problem which could allow us the ability to love. Especially love ourselves for making the right choice in the first place.
It is a prerequisite to receive an in-depth explanation of each emotion and what each represents to obtain a fuller comprehension of each emotion. It will be discovered a sequential order of the ten positive emotions are required before other positive emotions are able to be brought to the surface. As well, we will also discover all of the first nine negative emotions in sequential order are required to reach what would be the ultimate negative emotion such as hate. To hate, we must experience all the other negative emotions first to reach the stage of hate or self-hate.
All the definitions are precise and to the point. As you delve through the different emotions and their explanations, try to recall those events which you previously tossed about your minds. Examine the circumstances and try to match the emotion to the specific events of your life.

The PositiveEmotions:
 

COURAGE; determination, boldness, spirit, gallantry
Having courage is the beginning stage for developing total self-respect. Without courage or determination there would be a tendency for one to become disillusioned or afraid of all unknown factors. Being courageous, boldly going where no one else has gone before brings the survival instinct to the forefront of our personality. Being a survivalist is the preliminary stage of gallantry. Being gallant or brave develops the confidence to persevere. In retrospect to the exercise, if courage is defined as the corrective positive emotion than you can be assured that you must pull up your socks and begin to take control of the situation.

 

 

EMPATHY; understanding, comprehension, feel, sensibility

Without courage one cannot be empathic. Therefore to be empathic or to have empathy we must be able to be determined to understand the needs of others as well as our own needs. To feel is incredibly momentous because without the ability to feel it is impossible for anyone to have total faith in themselves. Comprehending the circumstance of others leads you toward the development of trust in others and especially in yourself. Being understanding in negative circumstances that you might have created and admitting your faults enhances the emotion of faith. If you find there is a problem understanding certain situations, you must realize you were the culprit who initiated those problems. If empathy is the corrective outcome then you are trying to understand your present situation.

 

 

FAITH; trust, expectation, reliance

Displaying personal faith requires a great deal of courage and empathy. Understanding yourself creates a trustful environment in which you can expect others to believe in you as well. Having faith in yourself gives the message to others to trust in you. Expectation when used constructively is the beginning stage to changing negative realities into positive realities. Relying on your own strengths and weaknesses produces the internal faith to continue onwards. If faith is the corrective positive emotion then you are trying to trust your inner most feelings and you should listen to the internal messages and follow through with your "gut hunch".

 

 

FREEDOM; liberty, independence, immunity

Developing a sense of freedom requires a vast amount of personal faith and courage, but once you do have faith and courage your understanding of all that surrounds you is amplified. Freedom can never be taken lightly, especially when you seek independence; not independence particularly from others but independence from your own limitations. Freedom is the ability to not be afraid to make positive decisions anytime a question arises. To become immune to negative circumstances you must rely on your ability to feel situations with a bold and determined spirit. If freedom is the outcome then you are actively seeking personal control of your present circumstances.

 

 

GRATITUDE; thankfulness, acknowledgment, recognition, praise

Being able to praise yourself requires freedom or independence from others. Acknowledging you have reached certain goals in your life develops enhanced courage or determination to succeed in other endeavors. You will win the personal recognition you so desire by understanding that your only limitations are the limitations you perceive to be there. Being grateful for what you have accomplished so far will give you the assurance self-respect is just around the corner. If gratitude is the outcome then you are at the stage of your life were you are questioning the emotional gifts that you have already received. Be very careful because you could convince yourself that your decision may be wrong.

 

 

HOPE; confidence, belief, assurance, security, secureness, desire, aspiration, optimism

Having hope is a result of previous recognition or praise received. Having faith in yourself develops a sense of security. Being courageous and understanding develops stronger confidence. Keeping all of your aspirations in order and not allowing detractors to destroy your determination creates the required optimism which will allow you the pleasures of life. If hope is the corrective outcome then you are ready to accept whatever may come your way as long as you are the one who initiated the circumstance.

 

 

JOY; pleasure, happiness, gayety, rejoicing, delight, triumph, congratulations, celebration

The thoughts of pleasurable excursions will give you hope and make you be thankful for all your past understandings and determination. To be joyful it is necessary to trust your inner-most feelings. Believing in yourself and others creates happiness and lets you triumph over adversity. Once you have reached the emotion of joy, the next step, that of love can easily be conquered. The ability to accept congratulations or a pat on the back is part of the rejoicing. If joy is the positive emotion then you are preparing to celebrate when your final decision is made.

 

 

LOVE; fondness, liking, inclination, regard, admiration, affection, tenderness, devotion

The old song ³Love Is A Many Splendor Thing² speaks for itself. For after overcoming many of the odds which were placed in your path, you are now striving to express the love for yourself and the love of others through the actions of courage and understanding, faith and hope, freedom and joy. You have been able to be thankful for all you have received. The major purpose of life unfolds once you have mastered the emotion love by learning to care for yourself first. Spending time on your own and loving self becomes refreshing and allows your mind to relax and regenerate. If love is the outcome then it is necessary to look at yourself as being a unique individual who is capable of being on your own and does not have a requirement of having another to fulfill your emotional needs.

 

 

PITY; compassion, tenderness, humanity, charity, sympathy, mercy, leniency

A good majority of people think pity is a negative word since it is normally used to pity or feel sorry for another. Using pity in a negative manner is incorrect. Pity involves showing compassion, being tender and being charitable, having sympathy but not degrading ourselves. Once you achieve the feeling of pity, reaching the ultimate stage of total self-respect becomes easy. Pity is the last emotion which must be overcome to obtain the feeling of self-respect. In recognizing your personal determination to succeed, to learn to live and love yourself, a combination of all the positive emotions particularly pity is necessary. If pity is the outcome then you are near the point of self-realization and intuitively you know that your compassion will defeat any adversary.

 

 

RESPECT; self-esteem, devotion, deference, consideration, honor, respectable, prerogative

The feeling of self-respect can very rarely be measured in words because respect for self and for others can only be obtained or felt after mastering the ten negative emotions, the nine other positive emotions and pride. Determining if you have achieved self-respect depends on your honesty. Self-respect can be accomplished once you no longer place the blame for your own personal follies on everyone but yourself. If respect is the outcome then you can be assured that any decision which you care to make will be successful and should be made without delay. The only caveat could be a combination negative emotion of hate which will offset your self-respect and cause you to procrastinate.

The Positive-NegativeEmotion:
 

PRIDE (POSITIVE); dignity, decorum, reserve, self-sufficiency
Having pride in yourself can be extremely positive as long as the pride does not go to your head and you do not become rigid in your quests. Your self-esteem can be utilized in decision making situations, but too much concern for yourself can lock out learning experiences which are presented to you from equal sources. If pride is the outcome than having pride of your accomplishments is beneficial, but there still is a tendency for you to be a fence-sitter and wait for others to help you make up your mind.

 

 

PRIDE (NEGATIVE); arrogance, insolence, pomposity, vanity

When your pride gets in the way of self-satisfaction or completion of an ultimate goal, the negativity generated such as; arrogance, and the egotistical mannerisms you have a tendency to display, will telegraph to all those who seek out negative people, that you are now ripe to be psychologically raped. By having too much pride you will have a tendency to fence-sit or procrastinate. If proud is the outcome then you are not prepared to make any decisions because you are too caught up in yourself and refuse to listen to your emotions which are telling you that enough is enough.

The NegativeEmotions
 

ANGER; resentment, irritation, annoyance, provocation, irritability, aggravation
As with the positive emotions, the negative emotions interact with one another; beginning with anger. Virtually all annoyances begin with resentment, which is to say resentment of yourself and eventually resentment of others. Once you function angrily, insensibility prevails. Once you allow another to irritate you, you place yourself into a position of apathy or unconcern towards the situation. Not allowing another to irritate you should be foremost on your mind. If anger is the negative emotion then your first regard should be to calm down and think in a more rational manner.

 

 

APATHY; coldness, insensibility, unconcern, recklessness, coldheartedness

Irritating situations breed coldness or unconcern for yourself and others. The combination of anger and apathy causes loss of understanding and determination which is detrimental to the achievement of even the lowest positive reaction to decisions or circumstances. Apathetic emotions cause egotistical responses. Unconcern for self, as well as others, is the beginning stage of egotism. If apathy is the outcome then it is time to stop being so childish and begin to look at your surroundings because eventually they will envelope you without you even being aware.

 

 

CONCEIT; vanity, egotism, fantasy, complacency, immodesty, presumptuousness, boastfulness

Being conceited is developing self-fulfilling prophecies which in most cases are negatively inclined. The self-fulfilling prophecies are caused by your unconcern and resentment of others. Conceit creates despair or sadness. and produces wishful thinking patterns and normally hinders your ability to have faith. Presumption of events or facts and, assuredly boasting of being correct, creates personal emotional disorders. The outcome of conceit removes you from rational thought. If conceit is the corrective emotion outcome then you are still hurting from the problem in question and refuse to accept that maybe your part in the problem was greater than what you wish to admit.

 

 

DESPAIR; haplessness, sadness, dejection, discouragement, lowliness, pessimism, discontent

Haplessness is caused by annoyance or unconcern for yourself. Sadness is nothing short of giving up on yourself. Needless to say pessimism establishes doubt which will create further hardships or sadness. Disparity reduces the ability of seeing situations as they really are. The cause of despair is the outcome of conceit, and viewing life through rose colored glasses. If despair is the outcome then it means that you are prepared to wallow in your emotional quagmire and foolishly believe that the problem you are facing will rectify itself. 

 

 

DOUBT; skepticism, irreligious, dubiety, disbelief, suspicion, distrust, hesitancy, indecision

A principal cause of doubt is your own inability to act upon events in a spontaneous manner; particularly with anger, frustration or resentment, but in the main, because of personal indecision. Doubt and fear are the most common negative emotions you can display. Being suspicious of others is only a reflection of yourself and the disbelief that we are all equal. If doubt is the negative emotion then you are loosing control of your strength to make rational decisions because you refuse to look at your many positive end-results and you don't believe that you have been properly rewarded.

 

 

ENVY; jealousy, spite, malice, ill-will

Feeling envious or jealous is attributed to your own concerns about the inability to be as successful as others. Being envious of others revolves around self-doubt; your personal negative vanities; and your lack of concern for yourself. The feelings of jealousy and malice are the beginning stages of disrespect caused by your personal fear of inadequacy. If envy is the outcome then you have placed yourself in a self-delusionary perspective and in all honesty you know full well that you didn't do everything that you had originally set out to do.

 

 

FEAR; anxiety, worry, apprehension, mistrust, dismay, panic, timidity, despondency, restlessness

Fear is one of the most critical negative emotions we can experience since it causes the more profound and dangerous negative emotions such as hate, guilt and greed to come to the surface. The cause of the emotional anxiety is the outcome of your past failures. The past failures were brought about by not properly preparing yourself beforehand and believing life is fatalistic. The panic or worry is attributed to your denial that life is made up of mind, body and spirit and if used properly they can create a more harmonious existence. If fear is the corrective emotion outcome then you have failed to live up to your own personal expectations. There could be a possibility that you may have set them too high.

 

 

GREED; desire, cupidity, avidity, covetousness, greediness, impatience, lust

Wanting something more than what it is worth, or wishing something which is not required produces the emotion of greed. Desires if used in a constructive way, can reap huge benefits, while desiring something without paying the cost of the desire leads to guilt. The omnipotent impatient attitude of greed places you in a stage of total despair and renders the need desire useless, which then produces the final outcome of guilt. Recognizing your past failures and being forgiving would render you beyond the grasps of greed. If greed is the outcome then your ambitions have been controlled by outside sources and you may no longer be in control of your environment. It is time to re-evaluate your path to coexistence.

 

 

GUILT; improbity, misconduct, misbehavior, sinfulness, error, fault, delinquency, dereliction, transgression

Walking around with guilt in yourself is one of the most unpleasant negative emotions. Guilt cannot be overcome without realizing you cannot change the past but you can definitely change the future. Nursing an emotional hang-over which guilt is, is self-flagellation and serves no purpose but to lead you to the lowest negative emotion which is hate; hate for yourself and hate for others. Guilt is nothing more then trying to find fault with others and not accepting a personal responsibility of delinquency in completing all your past and present established goals and decisions. If guilt is the outcome then you have recognized that you have been the psychological piranha who has been preying on all those around you. It is time to view yourself as the problem and not others.

 

 

HATE; loathing, resentment, dissatisfaction, coolness, hostility, acrimony, malice, dispirit, bitterness, revenge

The lowest type of hate is self-hate. Hate for others is only a reflection of yourself. Blaming others for your follies will never rectify the problems. The more a person hates, the more self-destructive he or she becomes. The bitterness, acrimony and loathing of yourself results in total self-destruction. The hostility attracts other negative circumstances such as revenge by those who seek the vulnerability of hateful creatures and these creatures become the victims of their own circumstance. If hate is the corrective emotion then it is necessary to complete a spiritual cleansing and remove yourself from the mainstream of life for a short while until you have dominated this most vicious feeling and are ready to re-enter society. Any decision which you would make at this time will be for naught.

THE 21 EMOTIONS EXERCISE
Library No EGC-2-811992-B

Copyright © Earl Gordon Curley 1981.


All rights reserved. The use of any part of this publication reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system, without prior consent of the author is an infringement of the copyright law and will be dealt with to the fullest extent of the law.
FIRST EDITION August 1981.

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